Seven movies I enjoy Tom Cruise in

1. Magnolia
2.
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Seven of my favorite quotes from "The Office"

1. Jim: Congratulations Universe. You win.

2. Dwight: Whenever I’m about to do something, I think “would an idiot do that?” and if they would, I do not do that thing.

3. Phyllis: Bob Vance bought this perfume for me in Metropolitan Orlando. It’s made from real pine.

4. Dwight: Fear is what it’s all about. You cannot sell while undergoing fear. You need to vanquish fear! One must wrestle fear to the ground. You will now wrestle my cousin Mose!

5. Michael: Bro’s before ho’s. Why? Because your bro’s are always there for you. They’ve got your back after your ho rips your heart out for no good reason. And you were nothing but great to your ho. And you told her that she was the only ho for you and that she was better than all the other ho’s in the world. And then…and then suddenly she’s not your ho no mo’.

6. Pam: Please don't throw garbage at me.

7. Jim: This scented candle, andle, andle … which I found in the mens’ bathroom, room, room … represents the eternal … burning … of competition … or something.
Kevin: It smells like cookies.
Jim: Yes it does. Yes it does, my friend.

How Crayons are made

I remember this video so well as a kid. But I neglected to remember how creepy the old women in the factory were. And the severe editing mistake of the girl using the crayon in the beginning, looking at it and clearly seeing that it was worn, and then at the end, she puts an untouched crayon back in the box. Very fishy. But, still very cool. I think liking this show so much as a kid is what puts me into a trance when I was the Discovery show, How It's Made.

Seven topics I am unlikely to ever make a list of seven of

Seven:

1. Reasons why I like eating olives
2. Things that annoy me about sleeping
3. Reasons why Valentine's Day should be a federal holiday
4. Products I bought from QVC's Doll House power hour
5. People I have killed with a sniper rifle
6. Of my deepest darkest most shameful secrets
7. Words that rhyme with truck

Photo Scavenger Hunt

Because I love to make people do crazy things, I sent my sister a mission for when she went to see her boyfriend in NYC a month ago. Needless to say, the results were awesome. Here is a list of what she had to do and a few pics of the results.

Ideally one or both of you should appear in each picture. However – if the angle is just impossible, its ok. "Express this" items may portray a scene or emotion. And if you get to use props, even better.

• Express this: New York is the best place in the world!
• One of you looking really bored at someplace really cool
• One of you cross dressed
• Express this: One of you farted but does not want to admit it
• One of you sleeping somewhere odd
• Express this: I want to murder that stranger (should be done with an actual stranger in that picture.)
• Dentures
• Something that does not belong in NYC at all
• Express this: I think that stranger is a vampire!
• Someone wearing inappropriate clothing
• Pair of Sex in the City–type shoes
• Five oranges, a banana and two kiwis
• Express this: You lost your winning lottery ticket
• Your name on a sign
• Five pigeons – no more, no less
• An Irish bar/pub that does not start with Mc, Mac, or O
• Express this: I wish I was a dancer on Broadway
• Someone who looks like someone famous
• Express this: I think that stranger is wonderful.
• Twins
• The best place you ate at while you were there
• The tackiest thing you found at a street vendor
• Express this: Rebellion.
• A Red Sox fan – wearing something Red Sox
• Express this: Patriotic
• Foreign tourist taking a photo of something that is not worthy of a photo

If anyone wants a customized scavenger hunt list (and I can't promise that I will not repeat some of the above items, but will include some unique ones), let me know and I will send you one. I love digital cameras!

This Geek moment brought to you by Saucier Enterprises

Thanks to Saucier for this one. I have to say, this IS pretty awesome.


Update: According to Amazon.com a Princess Leia wig is in the top 10 worst Valentine's Day gifts to give. Clearly, they have no idea what they are talking about.

Whedon + The Office = Fangirl drool

Spoilery for funny, not for plot. And the drool, its a serious problem. Its embarrasing.

Seven reasons I adore Mythbusters

1. It's a great blend of creativity and science. Even though their on camera problem solving might be slightly staged, its still great to find out how they get to the answers. They explain science in a non-pretentious way.
2. They are very safety minded. I worry.
   
3. They unabashedly geeks and quite proud of it.
4. Explosions. I think I have always liked the huge explosions but never cared for the sophomoric plots and acting of the action flick genre. Mythbusters gives me the explosions I really crave. And they always add the oomph factor to it to make the explosions bigger and better. Fire good.
5. Kari does not shy away from the manual labor of things. She is slightly girly, but never shies away from getting dirty. You can tell she brings a little of the cupcake factor for the men (or anyone attracted to women that is), but she has the brain muscle to back that up.
6. The people on the show are all about good feedback -- and they congratulate their successes. I know, I had to make science warm and fuzzy somehow.
   
7. I am in love with Adam Savage. So much so that I find myself giggling like I did in Math class with my 8th grade crush. Horn rimmed glasses (oh the glasses!), the occasional Indiana Jones hat, goofy, creative, good with his hands, great smile, adorable freckles, slight fearlessness, funny voices... I swoon.
   

Seven things that just are not funny nor amusing about the February 12 issue of Coffee News

I am sure there are other regions that get Coffee News. The tan legal sized newsletter that is folded in half and found at many various small restaurants and shops. It has horoscopes, local business ads, trivia, odd stories, and the worst jokes that typically run the "My wife said it was either her or fishing. God I miss her"-kind of jokes. Yet, for as horrible as it is, I can't resist grabbing one when I see it. I am just a sucker for any kind of trivia.

1. Before drawing boards were invented, what did everybody go back to?
2. Tag lines are the bumper stickers of the 90's
3. The Cancer Horoscope: It may be a good idea to clean out those items in your fridge that have overstayed their welcome. (And all the Cancers out there just fell asleep)
4. If practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, then why practice?
5. The Sagittarius horoscope: Someone who admires you will speak up. (Suspicious, right before Valentine's Day. And apparently the Sags are the biggest sad bastards of the lot)
6. Did you hear about the podiatrist who ran for mayor? He was defeated.
7. If nobody measures up, then check your yardstick.
   

Seven odd things from my dream journal

1. Matt R. was a stripper at a bowling alley
2. The clothing store sold garments soaked in blood -- cause it catered to vampires
3. I was kissing Matt Damon with peanut butter on our lips outside the UH staff office
4. We were very hungry and started eating pencil erasers, you know, just to fill the void.
5. I was Rebeeca Roman-Stamos and I had a breast with a blue nipple and I was sleeping with Austin Powers and then I was me again and lecturing Mike Myers on how his movies make me feel inadequate.
6. Then I flash to a party where the DJ is 97 and is sleeping at the board and no one can figure it out so I do.
7. Will Ferrell shakes my hand and tickles my arm.
   

Seven questions I usually want to know about people I know or have just met

1. When were you born?
2. What albums usually make it into heavy rotation when you listen?
3. What are you a geek about?
4. When I snort and laugh, is it annoying you?
5. What new thing can you teach/show me?
6. What book/movie/music recommendation can you give me?
7. Can I trust you?
   

Imitiation of Traci

One of the Stonecoast faculty would have his students do "imitations" of other poet's work. To try on a new style or form... their shoes in essence. I found myself writing this a few weeks ago, and realized it was an imitiation of the Traci Boztenka. (and Traci -- I think I just butchered the hell out of your beautiful Polish name) Traci is this wild wolf woman poet who writes these really primal sensual images that might seem alien to you at first -- but then the familiarity of what she is expressing at hits you later on. And you realized that you really have a little wolf howling away in you after all. So here is my imitation of Traci in very rough form.


You ask me questions.
I put the answers in petals
laid in the grass.
Punctuate with clover blushing
purple and sweet to the bees.
I hope you can read it
with your pebble stoned eyes.
I wait in the tree for you and your axe,
handle worn from your house's hands.
Cut me down. Splinter this home.
Burn it under Mars' eye unblinking in the dark.
This is what I need you to do.
Break this. Burn this.
Bury the ashes in my breast.