The top 10 most in-demand college majors:
1. Accounting
2. Electrical engineering
3. Mechanical engineering
4. Business administration/management
5. Economics/finance
6. Computer science
7. Computer engineering
8. Marketing/marketing management
9. Chemical engineering
10. Information sciences and systems
Source: Job Outlook 2005 survey, conducted by the National Association of Colleges and Employers
Does anyone else find this a little creepy?
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
Oh John Cleese!
UK revocates Independence
John Cleese's Letter to the USA
To the citizens of the United States of America, in light of your failure to elect a competent President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective today.
Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II resumes monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories. Except Utah, which she does not fancy.
Your new prime minister (The Right Honourable Tony Blair, MP for the 97.8% of you who have, until now, been unaware there's a world outside your borders) will appoint a Minister for America. Congress and the Senate are disbanded. A questionnaire circulated next year will determine whether any of you noticed.
To aid your transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:
1. Look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary. Check "aluminium" in the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you pronounce it. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'favour' and 'neighbour'. Likewise you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters. Generally, you should raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Look up "vocabulary." Using the same twenty seven words interspersed with filler noises such as "like" and "you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. Look up "interspersed." There will be no more 'bleeps' in the Jerry Springer show. If you're not old enough to cope with bad language then you should not have chat shows.
2. There is no such thing as "U.S. English." We'll let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take account of the reinstated letter 'u'.
3. You should learn to distinguish English and Australian accents. It really isn't that hard. English accents are not limited to cockney, upper-class twit or Mancunian (Daphne in Frasier). Scottish dramas such as 'Taggart' will no longer be broadcast with subtitles.You must learn that there is no such place as Devonshire in England. The name of the county is "Devon." If you persist in calling it Devonshire, all American States will become "shires" e.g. Texasshire Floridashire, Louisianashire.
4. You should relearn your original national anthem, "God Save The Queen", but only after fully carrying out task 1.
5. You should stop playing American "football." There's only one kind of football. What you call American "football" is not a very good game. The 2.1% of you aware there is a world outside your borders may have noticed no one else plays "American" football. You should instead play proper football. Initially, it would be best if you played with the girls.
Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which is similar to American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies).
You should stop playing baseball. It's not reasonable to host an event called the 'World Series' for a game which is not played outside of America. Instead of baseball, you will be allowed to play a girls' game called "rounders," which is baseball without fancy team stripe, oversized gloves, collector cards or hotdogs.
6. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry guns, or anything more dangerous in public than a vegetable peeler. Because you are not sensible enough to handle potentially dangerous items, you need a permit to carry a vegetable peeler.
7. July 4th is no longer a public holiday. November 2nd will be a new national holiday. It will be called "Indecisive Day."
8. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean. All road intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left. At the same time, you will go metric without the benefit of conversion tables. Roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.
9. Learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips. Fries aren't French, they're Belgian though 97.8% of you (including the guy who discovered fries while in Europe) are not aware of a country called Belgium. Potato chips are properly called "crisps." Real chips are thick cut and fried in animal fat. The traditional accompaniment to chips is beer which should be served warm and flat.
10. The cold tasteless stuff you call beer is actually lager. Only proper British Bitter will be referred to as "beer." Substances once known as "American Beer" will henceforth be referred to as "Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine," except for the product of the American Budweiser company which will be called "Weak Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine." This will allow true Budweiser (as manufactured for the last 1000 years in Pilsen, Czech Republic) to be sold without risk of confusion.
11. The UK will harmonise petrol prices (or "Gasoline," as you will be permitted to keep calling it) for those of the former USA, adopting UK petrol prices (roughly $6/US gallon, get used to it).
12. Learn to resolve personal issues without guns, lawyers or therapists. That you need many lawyers and therapists shows you're not adult enough to be independent. If you're not adult enough to sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, you're not grown up enough to handle a gun.
13. Please tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us crazy.
14. Tax collectors from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all revenues due (backdated to 1776).
Thank you for your co-operation.
* John Cleese
[Basil Fawlty, Fawlty Towers, Torquay, Devon, England]
(Thanks to Shannon on this one!)
John Cleese's Letter to the USA
To the citizens of the United States of America, in light of your failure to elect a competent President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective today.
Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II resumes monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories. Except Utah, which she does not fancy.
Your new prime minister (The Right Honourable Tony Blair, MP for the 97.8% of you who have, until now, been unaware there's a world outside your borders) will appoint a Minister for America. Congress and the Senate are disbanded. A questionnaire circulated next year will determine whether any of you noticed.
To aid your transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:
1. Look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary. Check "aluminium" in the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you pronounce it. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'favour' and 'neighbour'. Likewise you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters. Generally, you should raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Look up "vocabulary." Using the same twenty seven words interspersed with filler noises such as "like" and "you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. Look up "interspersed." There will be no more 'bleeps' in the Jerry Springer show. If you're not old enough to cope with bad language then you should not have chat shows.
2. There is no such thing as "U.S. English." We'll let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take account of the reinstated letter 'u'.
3. You should learn to distinguish English and Australian accents. It really isn't that hard. English accents are not limited to cockney, upper-class twit or Mancunian (Daphne in Frasier). Scottish dramas such as 'Taggart' will no longer be broadcast with subtitles.You must learn that there is no such place as Devonshire in England. The name of the county is "Devon." If you persist in calling it Devonshire, all American States will become "shires" e.g. Texasshire Floridashire, Louisianashire.
4. You should relearn your original national anthem, "God Save The Queen", but only after fully carrying out task 1.
5. You should stop playing American "football." There's only one kind of football. What you call American "football" is not a very good game. The 2.1% of you aware there is a world outside your borders may have noticed no one else plays "American" football. You should instead play proper football. Initially, it would be best if you played with the girls.
Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which is similar to American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies).
You should stop playing baseball. It's not reasonable to host an event called the 'World Series' for a game which is not played outside of America. Instead of baseball, you will be allowed to play a girls' game called "rounders," which is baseball without fancy team stripe, oversized gloves, collector cards or hotdogs.
6. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry guns, or anything more dangerous in public than a vegetable peeler. Because you are not sensible enough to handle potentially dangerous items, you need a permit to carry a vegetable peeler.
7. July 4th is no longer a public holiday. November 2nd will be a new national holiday. It will be called "Indecisive Day."
8. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean. All road intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left. At the same time, you will go metric without the benefit of conversion tables. Roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.
9. Learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips. Fries aren't French, they're Belgian though 97.8% of you (including the guy who discovered fries while in Europe) are not aware of a country called Belgium. Potato chips are properly called "crisps." Real chips are thick cut and fried in animal fat. The traditional accompaniment to chips is beer which should be served warm and flat.
10. The cold tasteless stuff you call beer is actually lager. Only proper British Bitter will be referred to as "beer." Substances once known as "American Beer" will henceforth be referred to as "Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine," except for the product of the American Budweiser company which will be called "Weak Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine." This will allow true Budweiser (as manufactured for the last 1000 years in Pilsen, Czech Republic) to be sold without risk of confusion.
11. The UK will harmonise petrol prices (or "Gasoline," as you will be permitted to keep calling it) for those of the former USA, adopting UK petrol prices (roughly $6/US gallon, get used to it).
12. Learn to resolve personal issues without guns, lawyers or therapists. That you need many lawyers and therapists shows you're not adult enough to be independent. If you're not adult enough to sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, you're not grown up enough to handle a gun.
13. Please tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us crazy.
14. Tax collectors from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all revenues due (backdated to 1776).
Thank you for your co-operation.
* John Cleese
[Basil Fawlty, Fawlty Towers, Torquay, Devon, England]
(Thanks to Shannon on this one!)
Questions ago-go: Kath Kohler answers
1. Tell us about one of the best Kohler family traditions/quirks.
Best traditions would include the Kohler Christmas party Trivial Pursuit Battle; the ping-pong tournaments between my sisters, dad, and I; and going to PennState football games together. These are great traditions because theyinvolve much laughter and are relaxing and fun times. Quirks, the best one is probably how my dad and youngest sister do impressions of the Ladies Man, including words uttered such as "I'd like to thank the lord for my superiorwang". Considering they do this often, and at inopportune times (ie in church) makes it quite quirky and hysterical at the same time.
2. A pharmacist has 8 liters of a 15 percent solution of acid. How muchdistilled water must she add to reduce the concentration of acid to 10percent?
Well, let's see. Currently, .8+.4, so currently 1.2 liters ofyour solution is acidic. So, to make that equal to 10% of your solution, you need 12 total liters. Therefore 4 liters of water need to be added to your current 8 liters solution. And why does a pharmacist have acid anyways?
3. If your life/moment in your life were to be summed up in one music video:what would the song be, who would be in it, who would direct it, etc.?
It'd be a mega mix of songs including:
Sittin on the Dock of the Bay (Otis Redding) - friends (including Cookie) sitting around on a nice day relaxing
You are the sunshine of my life (Stevie Wonder) - future Kath with husband and kids
Girls just wanna have fun (Cyndi Lauper)- my girlfriends from high school and college and sisters going nuts
Let the good times roll (Cars)- again, all of us sitting around relaxing and having fun on a nice day
Theme from Rocky. Just because I love it and it inspires me. What can I say I am a Philly gal.
4. What is one of your funniest stories?
Just one? I guess the time that Meg and I almost got caught stealing liquor out of her parents liquor cabinet down the shore. It cannot be written as well as it is told, as Jay will attest to, so you'll have to come to Philly and have Meg and I tell it to you. It is sufficient to say that we both were nearly grounded for an entire summer but thanks to some quick thinking were able to avoid it.
5. Why is Penn State so cool in your eyes?
Penn State is cool to me because I had so much fun while I was there. When I go back it brings back happy memories, a time of freedom, good friends, not much stress (at least not real stress). I learned a lot about myself there. Also, my idea of a perfect fall Saturday is tailgating with family and friends, grilling out, playing catch with a football, going into the game and watching (great atmosphere- win or lose), and then out to dinner.
6. If the Trading Spaces people were to do a room for you, what could theyput in there that would make you so upset that you wished they never did it?
A coffin. A picture of Michael Bolton. Anything having to do with snakes. A statue of Jay Lewis. A strobe light.
Best traditions would include the Kohler Christmas party Trivial Pursuit Battle; the ping-pong tournaments between my sisters, dad, and I; and going to PennState football games together. These are great traditions because theyinvolve much laughter and are relaxing and fun times. Quirks, the best one is probably how my dad and youngest sister do impressions of the Ladies Man, including words uttered such as "I'd like to thank the lord for my superiorwang". Considering they do this often, and at inopportune times (ie in church) makes it quite quirky and hysterical at the same time.
2. A pharmacist has 8 liters of a 15 percent solution of acid. How muchdistilled water must she add to reduce the concentration of acid to 10percent?
Well, let's see. Currently, .8+.4, so currently 1.2 liters ofyour solution is acidic. So, to make that equal to 10% of your solution, you need 12 total liters. Therefore 4 liters of water need to be added to your current 8 liters solution. And why does a pharmacist have acid anyways?
3. If your life/moment in your life were to be summed up in one music video:what would the song be, who would be in it, who would direct it, etc.?
It'd be a mega mix of songs including:
Sittin on the Dock of the Bay (Otis Redding) - friends (including Cookie) sitting around on a nice day relaxing
You are the sunshine of my life (Stevie Wonder) - future Kath with husband and kids
Girls just wanna have fun (Cyndi Lauper)- my girlfriends from high school and college and sisters going nuts
Let the good times roll (Cars)- again, all of us sitting around relaxing and having fun on a nice day
Theme from Rocky. Just because I love it and it inspires me. What can I say I am a Philly gal.
4. What is one of your funniest stories?
Just one? I guess the time that Meg and I almost got caught stealing liquor out of her parents liquor cabinet down the shore. It cannot be written as well as it is told, as Jay will attest to, so you'll have to come to Philly and have Meg and I tell it to you. It is sufficient to say that we both were nearly grounded for an entire summer but thanks to some quick thinking were able to avoid it.
5. Why is Penn State so cool in your eyes?
Penn State is cool to me because I had so much fun while I was there. When I go back it brings back happy memories, a time of freedom, good friends, not much stress (at least not real stress). I learned a lot about myself there. Also, my idea of a perfect fall Saturday is tailgating with family and friends, grilling out, playing catch with a football, going into the game and watching (great atmosphere- win or lose), and then out to dinner.
6. If the Trading Spaces people were to do a room for you, what could theyput in there that would make you so upset that you wished they never did it?
A coffin. A picture of Michael Bolton. Anything having to do with snakes. A statue of Jay Lewis. A strobe light.
Monday, March 28, 2005
Whedon Considering Affleck as Wonder Woman
In a bold move by newly announced writer/producer of the Wonder Woman movie, Joss Whedon revealed he's considering Ben Affleck for the leading role.
"It's no secret that female superhero movies don't fare well at the box office, " commented Whedon at the Comic Book Convention in Los Angeles. "We have to take movies like 'Elektra' and 'Catwoman' and learn from them.
"Whedon, who has been approached by every actress from Brittany Murphy to Lucy Lawless to play the role of America's most beloved female superhero, says they're not ready to make the final decision.
"Obviously, we're looking for an Amazonian Princess, so that rules out most of the female actors in Hollywood. We need someone who's big and strong. I see no other option than to cast Ben Affleck. Besides, he was fantastic in DareDevil." said Whedon as he doodled Affleck in red, gold, and blue spandex.
Not everyone is excited about the prospect of Affleck playing Wonder Woman. In fact, some people are downright skeptical.
"I don't see how they're going to make Ben look like a woman." commented David Boreanaz. "There are tons of possible actors that could play Wonder Woman. Take, for example, me. I'm big and tall, too. I could be Wonder Woman. I could, I really could."
Warner Brothers has been considering a Wonder Woman movie for several years; however, they were not able to come up with a plot.
"I want to bring a new approach to the Wonder Woman adventures. Maybe something a little more 'in the now'." explained Whedon. "I'm still working out the details, but maybe Ben, or whoever we choose, doesn't have to look like a woman. Maybe Wonder Woman was really a woman trapped in a man's body. Maybe Wonder Woman is a gorgeous six-foot transvestite. All I know is we have a ways to go on the script."
Affleck's agent refused comment at this time, but did say they will contact us if Ben accepts the role. Also considered for the leading role are Josh Hartnett, Keanu Reeves, and Morgan Freeman.
(from: http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s4i7743)
Hiiiiiiilarious. (say that like Jerri Blank would)
"It's no secret that female superhero movies don't fare well at the box office, " commented Whedon at the Comic Book Convention in Los Angeles. "We have to take movies like 'Elektra' and 'Catwoman' and learn from them.
"Whedon, who has been approached by every actress from Brittany Murphy to Lucy Lawless to play the role of America's most beloved female superhero, says they're not ready to make the final decision.
"Obviously, we're looking for an Amazonian Princess, so that rules out most of the female actors in Hollywood. We need someone who's big and strong. I see no other option than to cast Ben Affleck. Besides, he was fantastic in DareDevil." said Whedon as he doodled Affleck in red, gold, and blue spandex.
Not everyone is excited about the prospect of Affleck playing Wonder Woman. In fact, some people are downright skeptical.
"I don't see how they're going to make Ben look like a woman." commented David Boreanaz. "There are tons of possible actors that could play Wonder Woman. Take, for example, me. I'm big and tall, too. I could be Wonder Woman. I could, I really could."
Warner Brothers has been considering a Wonder Woman movie for several years; however, they were not able to come up with a plot.
"I want to bring a new approach to the Wonder Woman adventures. Maybe something a little more 'in the now'." explained Whedon. "I'm still working out the details, but maybe Ben, or whoever we choose, doesn't have to look like a woman. Maybe Wonder Woman was really a woman trapped in a man's body. Maybe Wonder Woman is a gorgeous six-foot transvestite. All I know is we have a ways to go on the script."
Affleck's agent refused comment at this time, but did say they will contact us if Ben accepts the role. Also considered for the leading role are Josh Hartnett, Keanu Reeves, and Morgan Freeman.
(from: http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s4i7743)
Hiiiiiiilarious. (say that like Jerri Blank would)
Questions ago-go: Kath Kohler
Yes, I know it is the long awaited event. You know the drill Kath, especially because you send me the answers to other people's questions, email me your answers and I will post.
1. Tell us about one of the best Kohler family traditions/quirks.
2. A pharmacist has 8 liters of a 15 percent solution of acid. How much distilled water must she add to reduce the concentration of acid to 10 percent?
3. If your life/moment in your life were to be summed up in one music video: what would the song be, who would be in it, who would direct it, etc.?
4. What is one of your funniest stories?
5. Why is Penn State so cool in your eyes?
6. If the Trading Spaces people were to do a room for you, what could they put in there that would make you so upset that you wished they never did it?
1. Tell us about one of the best Kohler family traditions/quirks.
2. A pharmacist has 8 liters of a 15 percent solution of acid. How much distilled water must she add to reduce the concentration of acid to 10 percent?
3. If your life/moment in your life were to be summed up in one music video: what would the song be, who would be in it, who would direct it, etc.?
4. What is one of your funniest stories?
5. Why is Penn State so cool in your eyes?
6. If the Trading Spaces people were to do a room for you, what could they put in there that would make you so upset that you wished they never did it?
Sara Recommends 5
Winking
I think it is one of my favorite facial gestures. From the exagerated Will Ferrell wink to the subtle mischevous wink, it is hands down adorable. Plus, at times it can be very mysterious.
Recreating holidays with friends
Easter has never been a big deal for me. It is not one of those I-need-to-be-home kinda deals. When you are a kid it's fun because of the bunnies and hollow chocolate and easter baskets and the plastic grass that gets stuck in your peanut butter cups and the cadbury eggs and all of that. But when you are older, and don't really do the whole Christ thing.... it loses its meaning. So thus, I am going to a Chinese buffet. As I told Saucier, "Nothing says Christ died for my sins like a pupu platter."
Beer in a wine glass
Anything is a wine glass is just more fun. Not to mention classy and sexy as hell. I love the traditional pint glass, but hell, you could put some PBR in a wine glass and it's refined.
Ginger
I will always be a sucker for my citrusy-scents, and Love Spell will always be my standby, but as of late I have a warm spicy aroma that has been bewitching me. Ginger is now the scent of choice. It's hard to find sometimes, and I have yet to find it in one product that I really like. Its comforting yet a little exotic and biting. Plus, I like the idea of kissing someone and having left a ginger imprint on them.
Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life, Amy Krouse Rosenthal
Amy, as I like to call her, writes in short bursts, and then collects them all in a way that is very refreshing. In The Book of Eleven, she put them all in quirky lists of eleven. In Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life, she creates an encyclopedia of her experiences and observations. It's humorous, poignant, and a great read.
http://www.encyclopediaofanordinarylife.com/
Gods and Monsters
I have not watched this movie in a few years, and it was great to rediscover it. Believe it or not, Brendan Frasier can act! And, Sir Ian McKellan, how I adore thee. He is stunning in his pain and his humor. And I never would have given a second thought to Vanessa Redgrave, but she is pathetic and witty as the housekeeper who condemns and loves her master. This movie is just beautiful, and subtely so. It does not go for the over the top, it goes to the moments of the human core without bleeding all over you. Bill Condon, director of Kinsey, wrote and directed this film.
My Funny Valentine
Some people might read this and think, "I know she hates Valentine's day, and prefers to wear black and support the Frankenstein Day movement (see: Ham, Torrey)." But this is one of my favorite songs ever. Like maybe top 10. Or at least top ten songs I love no matter who covers it (i.e.: "Halleluia" or "Tangled up in Blue"). But this song makes me want to find that love. I know the person I finally give up my cynical side for is going to be that quirky person that I find more precious than anything. That person who never needs to try to make me light, they just have to walk into the room and they flip that little light switch in me. It has not happened. Maybe I have tricky wiring, or my bulb needs to be changed... but it has not happened yet. Blah, blah, blah.... being bitter and single does not make me unique, so moving on...
The song ends with "Each day is Valentine's Day", which I agree with. Not the going to an expensive dinner, dozen red unnatural roses, and lots of pressure kinda Valentine -- but that simple expression of love that is at the core of what it is supposed to mean. You don't need a day -- it should happen all the time. This moment of cheesy expression is brought to you by Geary's Summer Ale.
I think it is one of my favorite facial gestures. From the exagerated Will Ferrell wink to the subtle mischevous wink, it is hands down adorable. Plus, at times it can be very mysterious.
Recreating holidays with friends
Easter has never been a big deal for me. It is not one of those I-need-to-be-home kinda deals. When you are a kid it's fun because of the bunnies and hollow chocolate and easter baskets and the plastic grass that gets stuck in your peanut butter cups and the cadbury eggs and all of that. But when you are older, and don't really do the whole Christ thing.... it loses its meaning. So thus, I am going to a Chinese buffet. As I told Saucier, "Nothing says Christ died for my sins like a pupu platter."
Beer in a wine glass
Anything is a wine glass is just more fun. Not to mention classy and sexy as hell. I love the traditional pint glass, but hell, you could put some PBR in a wine glass and it's refined.
Ginger
I will always be a sucker for my citrusy-scents, and Love Spell will always be my standby, but as of late I have a warm spicy aroma that has been bewitching me. Ginger is now the scent of choice. It's hard to find sometimes, and I have yet to find it in one product that I really like. Its comforting yet a little exotic and biting. Plus, I like the idea of kissing someone and having left a ginger imprint on them.
Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life, Amy Krouse Rosenthal
Amy, as I like to call her, writes in short bursts, and then collects them all in a way that is very refreshing. In The Book of Eleven, she put them all in quirky lists of eleven. In Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life, she creates an encyclopedia of her experiences and observations. It's humorous, poignant, and a great read.
http://www.encyclopediaofanordinarylife.com/
Gods and Monsters
I have not watched this movie in a few years, and it was great to rediscover it. Believe it or not, Brendan Frasier can act! And, Sir Ian McKellan, how I adore thee. He is stunning in his pain and his humor. And I never would have given a second thought to Vanessa Redgrave, but she is pathetic and witty as the housekeeper who condemns and loves her master. This movie is just beautiful, and subtely so. It does not go for the over the top, it goes to the moments of the human core without bleeding all over you. Bill Condon, director of Kinsey, wrote and directed this film.
My Funny Valentine
Some people might read this and think, "I know she hates Valentine's day, and prefers to wear black and support the Frankenstein Day movement (see: Ham, Torrey)." But this is one of my favorite songs ever. Like maybe top 10. Or at least top ten songs I love no matter who covers it (i.e.: "Halleluia" or "Tangled up in Blue"). But this song makes me want to find that love. I know the person I finally give up my cynical side for is going to be that quirky person that I find more precious than anything. That person who never needs to try to make me light, they just have to walk into the room and they flip that little light switch in me. It has not happened. Maybe I have tricky wiring, or my bulb needs to be changed... but it has not happened yet. Blah, blah, blah.... being bitter and single does not make me unique, so moving on...
The song ends with "Each day is Valentine's Day", which I agree with. Not the going to an expensive dinner, dozen red unnatural roses, and lots of pressure kinda Valentine -- but that simple expression of love that is at the core of what it is supposed to mean. You don't need a day -- it should happen all the time. This moment of cheesy expression is brought to you by Geary's Summer Ale.
Thursday, March 17, 2005
Questions ago-go: Torrey answers
First of all, I apologize for the length of this but I got in a groove and I just went with it.
1. Which fictional world do you wish you could live in?
This answer is probably going to surprise most people who know me, particularly Cookie, but I’m going to say the world of Harry Potter. The main reason this is my choice is that I would love to live in a world with all of today’s modern technology existing along with magic. My initial instincts went toward Lord of the Rings, but who am I kidding…they didn’t even have electricity and I’m a gadget whore. Plus I’m a lover not a fighter. I like the possibilities magic opens up and I think the world would be far more interesting if it actually existed.
2. Why is Walmart evil?
Wal-mart is evil because it forces small establishments out of business due to the fact that they can’t compete with their enormous corporate-powered girth. It also spreads across the country like locusts, leaving a wake of destruction and heartache behind it. I think I read once that Wal-mart’s ultimate goal is for someone to be within 20 minutes of a Wal-mart store no matter where they are in the country. In Lincoln, where I grew up, Wal-mart moving to town lead to the closing of a half dozen privately-owned businesses on main street alone- one of them being Images Bookstore where I purchased all my reading material, from Michael Crichton to MAD Magazine, since I was knee-high to a comic book. Hannah, if you should stumble across Cookie’s blog, you were the greatest bookstore clerk a boy could ask for. Thanks for all those Terry Brooks special orders.
3. Favorite childhood toy.
I’m gonna go with Legos on this one- simply because they spawned so much creativity. I had a lot of Transformers, Masters of the Universe figures and Ninja Turtles, but your imagination can only go so far with those. Legos offered a lot more flexibility. In fact, I would incorporate Legos into my action figure adventures. The sinister Shredder would kidnap April O’Neal, placing her in a make-shift Lego prison that the Turtles would have to break her out of. Plus any Lego invention was instantly made cooler with the addition of snap-on wheels. When talking to parents, I’m pleased to hear that Legos are still popular among the kids today.
4. Name five movies you are looking forward to coming out this year and why.
This looks to be a pretty solid year for movies, so I’m going to double Cookie’s quota and list off 10 movies I’m looking forward to this year.
-Batman Begins
I’ve already said this to some of my friends- Chris Nolan could make this entire movie with hand puppets and it would still be better than Batman & Robin. Joel Schumacher, I know you’re a brotha and all but damn did you make some horrible, horrible Batman movies. Since no one has been able to forget those awful sequels, this movie shouldn’t have too hard of a time winning over the fans. Starting fresh with Batman in his first years is a smart move, and it looks like they’ve put together a strong cast (Gary Oldman looks exactly like the younger Jim Gordon from the comics). I’m betting this one will come together in a nice package.
-Strangers with Candy
It’s no secret how much I adore the show and I’ll take more Strangers in any way, shape or form I can get it. With the entire cast returning I have no doubts that it will be friggin hilarious from start to finish.
-Charlie and the Chocolate Factory/Corpse Bride
What a year to be a Tim Burton fan! CATCF sounds like it’s coming along very nicely- in an interview with John August, the screenwriter, he said that about 90% of the book will be in the film. Timmy was the only director that could get approval to make the film from the Dahl estate and I am very excited to see his take on the wacky tale. Then later in the year Tim’s latest stop-animation film Corpse Bride is coming out- just in time for Halloween. It pleases me to no end that in this time when computer animation is all the rage, people haven’t abandoned other art forms like claymation. Artistic talent should be expressed in as many forms as possible, I say!
-Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
I thought The Sorcerer’s Stone was pretty good and that The Chamber of Secrets was only okay, but boy howdy did they get me hooked with The Prisoner of Azkaban. Alfonso Cuaron put together what may be the most visually pleasing ‘children’s’ movie I’ve ever seen. And the addition of Gary Oldman didn’t hurt things either. It looks like they are going to reel me in again with Goblet since I just read that Miranda Richardson and Ralph Fiennes have joined the troupe.
-Serenity
Anyone who has seen Firefly knows what horrible injustices were done to it, mostly from the juggernaut that was reality TV at the time the show debuted. I’m hoping the film does extremely well to show Fox what they missed out on. At the very least I hope Serenity does well enough to warrant a couple of sequels. They made a smart move pushing the release from April to September so that it wouldn’t be overshadowed by a certain other science fiction movie which you might notice is absent from my list.
-The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
I’ve never read the book, but the trailer to this film looks fantastic. Plus it has Sam Rockwell and Alan Rickman and I’ll watch those guys in anything. They also used gigantic Jim Henson puppets for a number of the aliens, rather than relying completely on CG creatures. I’m definitely down with the JH.
-War of the Worlds
Spielberg hasn’t ever really done a big budget, end-of-the-world disaster movie before so I’m curious to see what he does with Worlds. His movies tend to be more confined. Only teaser footage has been shown at this point so I’m not exactly sure what to expect, but I don’t often bet against Senior Spielbergo.
-The Brothers Grimm
With crazy movies like 12 Monkey and Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas under his belt, I’m eager to see what Terry Gilliam does with the Brothers Grimm fairytales. My husband, Matt Damon, stars in it along with Heath Ledger, so at the very least I’ll have eye candy.
-Wallace & Gromit
Oh how I love their entertaining little claymation shorts. If you’re keeping score that’s two stop-animation films coming out in 2005! I’ve been a W&G fan since junior high and I feared the characters may have been retired, until I read about their first full-length feature film coming out this fall! If you’ve never seen the collection of W&G shorts, you owe it to yourself to pick up the DVD. You’ll never look at penguins the same way again.
-King Kong
Peter Jackson is directing it. That’s all anyone needs to know.
5. If you could have your dream cast for a movie, who would you pick and what kind of movie would it be?
The film would be a comedic murder mystery along the lines of Clue and would feature an obscenely talented cast comprised of Joan Cusack, Sir Ian McKellen, Amy Sedaris, Matt Damon, Johnny Depp, William H. Macy, Gary Oldman, Catherine O’Hara, Alan Rickman, Julianne Moore, Nathan Lane, Jennifer Coolidge, David Cross, Bill Murray, Peter Sarsgaard, John Cusack, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Frances McDormand, Jeff Goldblum, Jude Law, Patricia Clarkson, Christopher Walken, Sam Rockwell and Jeffrey Tambor. The following year, this film would be recognized at the Oscars for having the ‘Greatest Ensemble Cast Ever.’
1. Which fictional world do you wish you could live in?
This answer is probably going to surprise most people who know me, particularly Cookie, but I’m going to say the world of Harry Potter. The main reason this is my choice is that I would love to live in a world with all of today’s modern technology existing along with magic. My initial instincts went toward Lord of the Rings, but who am I kidding…they didn’t even have electricity and I’m a gadget whore. Plus I’m a lover not a fighter. I like the possibilities magic opens up and I think the world would be far more interesting if it actually existed.
2. Why is Walmart evil?
Wal-mart is evil because it forces small establishments out of business due to the fact that they can’t compete with their enormous corporate-powered girth. It also spreads across the country like locusts, leaving a wake of destruction and heartache behind it. I think I read once that Wal-mart’s ultimate goal is for someone to be within 20 minutes of a Wal-mart store no matter where they are in the country. In Lincoln, where I grew up, Wal-mart moving to town lead to the closing of a half dozen privately-owned businesses on main street alone- one of them being Images Bookstore where I purchased all my reading material, from Michael Crichton to MAD Magazine, since I was knee-high to a comic book. Hannah, if you should stumble across Cookie’s blog, you were the greatest bookstore clerk a boy could ask for. Thanks for all those Terry Brooks special orders.
3. Favorite childhood toy.
I’m gonna go with Legos on this one- simply because they spawned so much creativity. I had a lot of Transformers, Masters of the Universe figures and Ninja Turtles, but your imagination can only go so far with those. Legos offered a lot more flexibility. In fact, I would incorporate Legos into my action figure adventures. The sinister Shredder would kidnap April O’Neal, placing her in a make-shift Lego prison that the Turtles would have to break her out of. Plus any Lego invention was instantly made cooler with the addition of snap-on wheels. When talking to parents, I’m pleased to hear that Legos are still popular among the kids today.
4. Name five movies you are looking forward to coming out this year and why.
This looks to be a pretty solid year for movies, so I’m going to double Cookie’s quota and list off 10 movies I’m looking forward to this year.
-Batman Begins
I’ve already said this to some of my friends- Chris Nolan could make this entire movie with hand puppets and it would still be better than Batman & Robin. Joel Schumacher, I know you’re a brotha and all but damn did you make some horrible, horrible Batman movies. Since no one has been able to forget those awful sequels, this movie shouldn’t have too hard of a time winning over the fans. Starting fresh with Batman in his first years is a smart move, and it looks like they’ve put together a strong cast (Gary Oldman looks exactly like the younger Jim Gordon from the comics). I’m betting this one will come together in a nice package.
-Strangers with Candy
It’s no secret how much I adore the show and I’ll take more Strangers in any way, shape or form I can get it. With the entire cast returning I have no doubts that it will be friggin hilarious from start to finish.
-Charlie and the Chocolate Factory/Corpse Bride
What a year to be a Tim Burton fan! CATCF sounds like it’s coming along very nicely- in an interview with John August, the screenwriter, he said that about 90% of the book will be in the film. Timmy was the only director that could get approval to make the film from the Dahl estate and I am very excited to see his take on the wacky tale. Then later in the year Tim’s latest stop-animation film Corpse Bride is coming out- just in time for Halloween. It pleases me to no end that in this time when computer animation is all the rage, people haven’t abandoned other art forms like claymation. Artistic talent should be expressed in as many forms as possible, I say!
-Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
I thought The Sorcerer’s Stone was pretty good and that The Chamber of Secrets was only okay, but boy howdy did they get me hooked with The Prisoner of Azkaban. Alfonso Cuaron put together what may be the most visually pleasing ‘children’s’ movie I’ve ever seen. And the addition of Gary Oldman didn’t hurt things either. It looks like they are going to reel me in again with Goblet since I just read that Miranda Richardson and Ralph Fiennes have joined the troupe.
-Serenity
Anyone who has seen Firefly knows what horrible injustices were done to it, mostly from the juggernaut that was reality TV at the time the show debuted. I’m hoping the film does extremely well to show Fox what they missed out on. At the very least I hope Serenity does well enough to warrant a couple of sequels. They made a smart move pushing the release from April to September so that it wouldn’t be overshadowed by a certain other science fiction movie which you might notice is absent from my list.
-The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
I’ve never read the book, but the trailer to this film looks fantastic. Plus it has Sam Rockwell and Alan Rickman and I’ll watch those guys in anything. They also used gigantic Jim Henson puppets for a number of the aliens, rather than relying completely on CG creatures. I’m definitely down with the JH.
-War of the Worlds
Spielberg hasn’t ever really done a big budget, end-of-the-world disaster movie before so I’m curious to see what he does with Worlds. His movies tend to be more confined. Only teaser footage has been shown at this point so I’m not exactly sure what to expect, but I don’t often bet against Senior Spielbergo.
-The Brothers Grimm
With crazy movies like 12 Monkey and Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas under his belt, I’m eager to see what Terry Gilliam does with the Brothers Grimm fairytales. My husband, Matt Damon, stars in it along with Heath Ledger, so at the very least I’ll have eye candy.
-Wallace & Gromit
Oh how I love their entertaining little claymation shorts. If you’re keeping score that’s two stop-animation films coming out in 2005! I’ve been a W&G fan since junior high and I feared the characters may have been retired, until I read about their first full-length feature film coming out this fall! If you’ve never seen the collection of W&G shorts, you owe it to yourself to pick up the DVD. You’ll never look at penguins the same way again.
-King Kong
Peter Jackson is directing it. That’s all anyone needs to know.
5. If you could have your dream cast for a movie, who would you pick and what kind of movie would it be?
The film would be a comedic murder mystery along the lines of Clue and would feature an obscenely talented cast comprised of Joan Cusack, Sir Ian McKellen, Amy Sedaris, Matt Damon, Johnny Depp, William H. Macy, Gary Oldman, Catherine O’Hara, Alan Rickman, Julianne Moore, Nathan Lane, Jennifer Coolidge, David Cross, Bill Murray, Peter Sarsgaard, John Cusack, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Frances McDormand, Jeff Goldblum, Jude Law, Patricia Clarkson, Christopher Walken, Sam Rockwell and Jeffrey Tambor. The following year, this film would be recognized at the Oscars for having the ‘Greatest Ensemble Cast Ever.’
Tuesday, March 15, 2005
My job is never boring
From the Portland Press Herald
USM building evacuated
GORHAM — Safety officials evacuated a University of Southern Maine dormitory and offices Monday after school postal staff discovered a suspicious envel- ope. The envelope was mailed from Gaza, via Israel, but was not addressed to anyone who works at or attends USM, school spokesman Bob Caswell said. The 9-by-12-inch envelope also contained a bulky object, had excessive postage, was addressed with block letters and misspellings and did not contain the required international customs stamp, USM Police Chief Lisa Beecher said.
The package was discovered in midmorning. State and local police as well as federal authorities were called, as was the Gorham Fire Department and the state's weapons of mass destruction civil support team. After chemical scans and X-rays determined the package was not an immediate threat, it was taken to the Maine State Police crime lab for further analysis, Caswell said.
Officials evacuated Upton-Hastings Hall, which houses the postal service, the police department and dormitory housing for 280 students, about 1:30 p.m. and allowed people to return 90 minutes later, Caswell said.
Yeah, so that is my home. Its amazing to stand up on top of the hill diverting people from the building and picturing it being blown up a la Jerry Bruckheimer.
USM building evacuated
GORHAM — Safety officials evacuated a University of Southern Maine dormitory and offices Monday after school postal staff discovered a suspicious envel- ope. The envelope was mailed from Gaza, via Israel, but was not addressed to anyone who works at or attends USM, school spokesman Bob Caswell said. The 9-by-12-inch envelope also contained a bulky object, had excessive postage, was addressed with block letters and misspellings and did not contain the required international customs stamp, USM Police Chief Lisa Beecher said.
The package was discovered in midmorning. State and local police as well as federal authorities were called, as was the Gorham Fire Department and the state's weapons of mass destruction civil support team. After chemical scans and X-rays determined the package was not an immediate threat, it was taken to the Maine State Police crime lab for further analysis, Caswell said.
Officials evacuated Upton-Hastings Hall, which houses the postal service, the police department and dormitory housing for 280 students, about 1:30 p.m. and allowed people to return 90 minutes later, Caswell said.
Yeah, so that is my home. Its amazing to stand up on top of the hill diverting people from the building and picturing it being blown up a la Jerry Bruckheimer.
Monday, March 14, 2005
Questions ago-go: Torrey
Torrey, please answer the questions and I will post them on the blog. Cross posting to your blog is allowed.
1. Which fictional world do you wish you could live in?
2. Why is Walmart evil?
3. Favorite childhood toy.
4. Name five movies you are looking forward to coming out this year and why.
5. If you could have your dream cast for a movie, who would you pick and what kind of movie would it be?
1. Which fictional world do you wish you could live in?
2. Why is Walmart evil?
3. Favorite childhood toy.
4. Name five movies you are looking forward to coming out this year and why.
5. If you could have your dream cast for a movie, who would you pick and what kind of movie would it be?
Thursday, March 10, 2005
Monday, February 28, 2005
Questions ago-go: Jay answers
From Jay:
First of all, sorry to Cookie and the fans of this website that I took too long to reply to the questions ... but I am a busy guy.
1. What did you like the most about Costa Rica?
It's hard to pick one best thing in Costa Rica- but I think my favorite was going to the rain forest because I had never been to a rain forest before
2. What five albums should every person hear at least once?
Blood on the Tracks - Bob Dylan
Blonde on Blonde - Bob Dylan
Horses - Patti Smith
Mingus Ah um - Charles Mingus
Legend - Bob Marley
3. What book do you wish you could "unread"?
Usually when I don't like a book, I just stop reading it after 50 pages or so. But one book I read all the way through and wish I hadn't was the Celestine Prophesy (sorry Kath).
4. Jerri and Jerry. If Blank and Seinfeld were ever to meet, what would that be like?
Jerri and Jerry.... Hmmm... that would be hilarious. I think there might be some sexual tension.
5. Favorite memory from Fredonia.
Hard to pick one- but I like Senior Year Fredfest cookout because it was loads of fun and all the important people were in attendance.
First of all, sorry to Cookie and the fans of this website that I took too long to reply to the questions ... but I am a busy guy.
1. What did you like the most about Costa Rica?
It's hard to pick one best thing in Costa Rica- but I think my favorite was going to the rain forest because I had never been to a rain forest before
2. What five albums should every person hear at least once?
Blood on the Tracks - Bob Dylan
Blonde on Blonde - Bob Dylan
Horses - Patti Smith
Mingus Ah um - Charles Mingus
Legend - Bob Marley
3. What book do you wish you could "unread"?
Usually when I don't like a book, I just stop reading it after 50 pages or so. But one book I read all the way through and wish I hadn't was the Celestine Prophesy (sorry Kath).
4. Jerri and Jerry. If Blank and Seinfeld were ever to meet, what would that be like?
Jerri and Jerry.... Hmmm... that would be hilarious. I think there might be some sexual tension.
5. Favorite memory from Fredonia.
Hard to pick one- but I like Senior Year Fredfest cookout because it was loads of fun and all the important people were in attendance.
Saturday, February 26, 2005
Gender
So, I have been thinking about gender and transgender lately. Reading about it and watching a movie. Granted, I was brought to the movie by my new life partner, Lee Pace of Wonderfalls..... pause a moment for a sigh. And moving on.... He plays Calpernia Addams in the movie A Solider's Girl, which is based on a true story. Calpernia is a transgender woman who falls in love with Barry Winchell, a solider in the Army. Barry is tormented at the base and killed there brutally. The military is a whole other beast which I cannot even begin to comprehend in issues like this. Don't ask, don't tell just perpetuates the discrimination and hate even more. But, that is another beast, and not what I want to write about. The book, She's Not There, is written by Jennifer Finney Boylan, a transgender woman. She writes of her transition and how it affected her life, family, work, etc. It is a very good read, she describes the experience very tactfully, without turning her life or her body into a freak show, no matter how alienated she may feel. I think there is this hidden interest in finding out all the nitty gritty to what goes on physiologically and a neglect to the identity issues. There is a local flare I like, it is set in Maine, she works at Colby College, and I am able to locate many of the places she talks about.
Gender (a person's identity) and sex (physical biology) do not always align. Not only could some one's gender not match their given sex, it is more fluid than just man and woman. I find it amazing and refreshing and admittedly a bit confusing to think of gender as fluid, not a binary. It takes us out of the proverbial box (perhaps poor choice of words there...) and gives us the opportunity for expression. I don't even think I could to begin to understand what it would be like to have been born in a male's body. Would it feel more comfortable? Or would I feel trapped? I identify as a woman, but not in the stereotypical ways. It frustrates me when people think that you are what you are born with: male=man, female=woman, and those who try to think differently are being trendy, or are trying to make being gay easier, etc... I would like the people who think that to spend one month in the body of the other gender they consider themselves in. It's ridiculous to think that it is a whim.... what transgender people do to transform their bodies and lives to become what they have been on the inside to the outside world. It is not an easy life.
I know this sounds preachy... but I am just churning the constructs of gender in my mind. Thinking about what the world will be like, will evolve to in many years . And what gender will mean in the future. What gender means now. It is a lot to handle and process and observe. And that is just me, a woman lucky enough to be born in a female's body.
http://www.calpernia.com/
http://www.colby.edu/personal/j/jfboylan/
Gender (a person's identity) and sex (physical biology) do not always align. Not only could some one's gender not match their given sex, it is more fluid than just man and woman. I find it amazing and refreshing and admittedly a bit confusing to think of gender as fluid, not a binary. It takes us out of the proverbial box (perhaps poor choice of words there...) and gives us the opportunity for expression. I don't even think I could to begin to understand what it would be like to have been born in a male's body. Would it feel more comfortable? Or would I feel trapped? I identify as a woman, but not in the stereotypical ways. It frustrates me when people think that you are what you are born with: male=man, female=woman, and those who try to think differently are being trendy, or are trying to make being gay easier, etc... I would like the people who think that to spend one month in the body of the other gender they consider themselves in. It's ridiculous to think that it is a whim.... what transgender people do to transform their bodies and lives to become what they have been on the inside to the outside world. It is not an easy life.
I know this sounds preachy... but I am just churning the constructs of gender in my mind. Thinking about what the world will be like, will evolve to in many years . And what gender will mean in the future. What gender means now. It is a lot to handle and process and observe. And that is just me, a woman lucky enough to be born in a female's body.
http://www.calpernia.com/
http://www.colby.edu/personal/j/jfboylan/
Friday, February 25, 2005
Questions ago-go: Jay
This segment's featured interviewee: Jay. Jay, email me your answers and I shall post it.
1. What did you like the most about Costa Rica?
2. What five albums should every person hear at least once?
3. What book do you wish you could "unread"?
4. Jerri and Jerry. If Blank and Seinfeld were ever to meet, what would that be like?
5. Favorite memory from Fredonia.
If others have thoughts on some of these questions, comment away.
1. What did you like the most about Costa Rica?
2. What five albums should every person hear at least once?
3. What book do you wish you could "unread"?
4. Jerri and Jerry. If Blank and Seinfeld were ever to meet, what would that be like?
5. Favorite memory from Fredonia.
If others have thoughts on some of these questions, comment away.
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
Sara Recommends 4
Champions of Norrath: Return to Arms
Well, I am just a hack and slash video game whore. The first person shooters just do not do it for me. Make me a Shadow Knight Elf with a shadow step power and a killer bow, and I am all over it. Sequel to Champions of Norrath, this one fixed little glitches and has a good story line, with very different worlds. I have not completed it yet - but it has led to great co-op play with Saucier and Joel. Plus, its always good times to play MST3K to a videogame with them.
Men in turtleneck sweaters
It is a weakness. I always like winterwear better than summerwear anyway. But, turtleneck sweaters on men... good lord. Its like my kryptonite. It is number one just above facial hair/stubble and jaunty caps.
Wonderfalls
On one hand, it has been able to be exposed through DVD, not fade away into the night like most brilliant cancelled shows. It only aired 4 episodes. To me that is a crime against quality TV. Shows that might seem a little off the main stream bullshit, the networks put them on these crappy shitty time slots. Same thing happened to Firefly. Anyway, there are 13 episodes that are solid, and create enough of a closure at the end to be statisfying. Quirky characters that you can be comfortable with but still end up suprising you. Talking inanimate objects are always fun! Plus, I am in love with Lee Pace. My only complaint is that they say "soda" several times. No self respecting western New Yorker would every say "soda". It's "pop" Hollywood, "pop".
Scattegories
This is a board game that never, ever gets old for me. It spawns some friendly debate and some very humorous answers. And the creativity it spawns its truly great. Not many board games do that.
Making your bed with clean sheets
Something ordinary, but that first night you sleep on that new bed is just bliss. Making those folds and tucks tight in the sheets -- it feels like you are tucked away in an envelope.
Well, I am just a hack and slash video game whore. The first person shooters just do not do it for me. Make me a Shadow Knight Elf with a shadow step power and a killer bow, and I am all over it. Sequel to Champions of Norrath, this one fixed little glitches and has a good story line, with very different worlds. I have not completed it yet - but it has led to great co-op play with Saucier and Joel. Plus, its always good times to play MST3K to a videogame with them.
Men in turtleneck sweaters
It is a weakness. I always like winterwear better than summerwear anyway. But, turtleneck sweaters on men... good lord. Its like my kryptonite. It is number one just above facial hair/stubble and jaunty caps.
Wonderfalls
On one hand, it has been able to be exposed through DVD, not fade away into the night like most brilliant cancelled shows. It only aired 4 episodes. To me that is a crime against quality TV. Shows that might seem a little off the main stream bullshit, the networks put them on these crappy shitty time slots. Same thing happened to Firefly. Anyway, there are 13 episodes that are solid, and create enough of a closure at the end to be statisfying. Quirky characters that you can be comfortable with but still end up suprising you. Talking inanimate objects are always fun! Plus, I am in love with Lee Pace. My only complaint is that they say "soda" several times. No self respecting western New Yorker would every say "soda". It's "pop" Hollywood, "pop".
Scattegories
This is a board game that never, ever gets old for me. It spawns some friendly debate and some very humorous answers. And the creativity it spawns its truly great. Not many board games do that.
Making your bed with clean sheets
Something ordinary, but that first night you sleep on that new bed is just bliss. Making those folds and tucks tight in the sheets -- it feels like you are tucked away in an envelope.
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Let's hope you never get one of these on your car!
http://www.iparklikeanidiot.com/
If I ever did get one, I would be pissed, but I would be admiring the genius of the sticker in the first place. Kudos and damn you in the same breath!
If I ever did get one, I would be pissed, but I would be admiring the genius of the sticker in the first place. Kudos and damn you in the same breath!
Thursday, February 10, 2005
Dream from October
I had this written down from last year and I just stumbled across it. So, because I find it so amusing, I am sharing it again.
I had a dream where I was swimming in a pool -- like a high school inside type -- with Ben stiller -- and we got to talking about Joss. And he said I would kill to work with him. And I said me too!! Then it cuts over to this film shoot where Joss Whedon is directing with Ben and Will Ferrell and this woman who kind of looks like Holly Hunter -- but its still not her. Well the movie is called wolfenstein and Will Ferrell is playing this mad scientist and Ben is playing his scientist side kick. Then some people start getting murdered. and there is this board full of tiles that has clues on it: spatters of blood, axes, weapons etc. and I am in the movie wearing a cape and then someone else gets murdered and Ben stiller and I have to grab the correct tile and try to solve it, so we grab a tile with the blood spatters and start running down this crazy hallway and we are being steady-camed the whole way through. Then at the end is a catering room. I go in there and try to find water, but there is only booze, and I go thirsty. And then I go to this other room (sans cape) and there are some people -- who look like they would be extras and crew members and we start talking about Joss and what he has worked on. And I was like "oh have you read fray" and "oh have you heard of common rotation" and so on. then this guy leans over to me and says "you know Joss likes a critical mind, so if you want to work with him you need to sound smarter then you are coming off right now" and I said "thanks for the info but you are a jerk." and then there is a cut to scene of Holly Hunterish and will fighting and she is winning and she is in a costume where her skin is painted all white and she has the letters on her chest and she has a blue cape and green hair and she is defeating Will and her costume is kind of disturbing because it outlines her womanness. Then fight and she wins the formula, but then they end up having sex.
I had a dream where I was swimming in a pool -- like a high school inside type -- with Ben stiller -- and we got to talking about Joss. And he said I would kill to work with him. And I said me too!! Then it cuts over to this film shoot where Joss Whedon is directing with Ben and Will Ferrell and this woman who kind of looks like Holly Hunter -- but its still not her. Well the movie is called wolfenstein and Will Ferrell is playing this mad scientist and Ben is playing his scientist side kick. Then some people start getting murdered. and there is this board full of tiles that has clues on it: spatters of blood, axes, weapons etc. and I am in the movie wearing a cape and then someone else gets murdered and Ben stiller and I have to grab the correct tile and try to solve it, so we grab a tile with the blood spatters and start running down this crazy hallway and we are being steady-camed the whole way through. Then at the end is a catering room. I go in there and try to find water, but there is only booze, and I go thirsty. And then I go to this other room (sans cape) and there are some people -- who look like they would be extras and crew members and we start talking about Joss and what he has worked on. And I was like "oh have you read fray" and "oh have you heard of common rotation" and so on. then this guy leans over to me and says "you know Joss likes a critical mind, so if you want to work with him you need to sound smarter then you are coming off right now" and I said "thanks for the info but you are a jerk." and then there is a cut to scene of Holly Hunterish and will fighting and she is winning and she is in a costume where her skin is painted all white and she has the letters on her chest and she has a blue cape and green hair and she is defeating Will and her costume is kind of disturbing because it outlines her womanness. Then fight and she wins the formula, but then they end up having sex.
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
The part of me that Torrey is scared of
My horoscope for the day:
It's often been said that you Sagittarians are the 'favorites of the Gods' because you're their clowns. Well, that might or might not be true, but that clownish way certainly has gotten you out of more than one difficult situation with mere mortals in the past, hasn't it? You might want to pull that talent out of the closet today, if a tough situation comes up, it will work wonders.
It's often been said that you Sagittarians are the 'favorites of the Gods' because you're their clowns. Well, that might or might not be true, but that clownish way certainly has gotten you out of more than one difficult situation with mere mortals in the past, hasn't it? You might want to pull that talent out of the closet today, if a tough situation comes up, it will work wonders.
Saturday, February 05, 2005
Random Friday Night Thoughts in the Burbs
Housesitting at Mike's, with the dogs and the cats and the garage and the snowbanks higher than my head. Had this moment yesterday when I started to panic, realizing that since getting back from the residency nearly a month ago (where the hell did that time go, I ask you? a blur of snow and cold peppered with drunken nights with the Stonecoast crowd, all of us just trying to survive until warmth returns to this godforsaken state), I have yet to write more than five damned pages in a row on that goddamn thing I like to call The Novel.
So, yesterday went into full resolution mode. Put away my Alias DVDs, stashed all Buffy paraphernalia, got out my Ellis Paul CDs and my go-to when writer's block sets in: The Last Good Kiss. Reveled for a while in the wonder that is Crumley, thought about getting myself a hard-drinkin' bulldog, and set to work.
Now, twenty-four hours later, I'm happy to say that the writer's block is - knock on wood, spin three times, spit into the wind and toss some salt over my shoulder for good measure - past. Got twenty pages done between last night and today, figured out who I needed to kill next and why they had to die (ah, the power of the novelist), and even managed a line or two that could pass for pretty fair prose. Then trudged through a fresh dusting of snow along the Back Bay this afternoon, and got back to find a fresh email from Dom, of the stylin' glasses and crooked grin. A good day, all the way around.
And what am I doing to celebrate? Well, I'm sitting in my brother's basement with Harvest the Dog snoring softly at my feet and Moon the Wonder Mutt settled in a snowbank outside (her preference), listening to U2, sorting postcards and - of course - writing this. The U2 thing is new... Well, not new, because of course once upon a time I was infatuated with them, but it's been renewed of late, and I'm not entirely sure why. When I was a kid, I got The Joshua Tree on vinyl for Christmas one year - my first rock n' roll album. I listened to it until I nearly wore through the grooves, obsessed with One Tree Hill (a much better song than that godawful show on the WB).
Now, listening to the CD, I'm reminded of sitting with Mike in his unheated bedroom (mine was unheated, too, but he had a better record player and a miniature pool table), shivering, shooting pool with tiny plastic cues and drinking root beer while Bono sang about wars we didn't know the first thing about. Yeah, we were bad-ass. My brother's basement office now has more pictures in it than my entire apartment: Mike and I in footed pajamas under the Christmas tree back in 1978, shots of Mike with baby Katie in his arms, Mike with his high school buddies reunited for a recent trip to Foxwoods... I think back to those days in his room, before boyfriends for me or girlfriends for him, before the folks got divorced, before we had any idea life might have some obstacles in mind rather than just letting us take over the world unimpeded. And I can't help but wonder...
What the hell happened to that pool table?
Because I think it would make a good addition to my apartment now, and I bet it's stashed in the back barn someplace at mom's. I'll have to check that out.
Okay, that's it. That's my post, those are my deep thoughts, think of them what you will. I have now done my duty as the less-productive half of this extraordinary blogging experiment, at least for this week.
So, yesterday went into full resolution mode. Put away my Alias DVDs, stashed all Buffy paraphernalia, got out my Ellis Paul CDs and my go-to when writer's block sets in: The Last Good Kiss. Reveled for a while in the wonder that is Crumley, thought about getting myself a hard-drinkin' bulldog, and set to work.
Now, twenty-four hours later, I'm happy to say that the writer's block is - knock on wood, spin three times, spit into the wind and toss some salt over my shoulder for good measure - past. Got twenty pages done between last night and today, figured out who I needed to kill next and why they had to die (ah, the power of the novelist), and even managed a line or two that could pass for pretty fair prose. Then trudged through a fresh dusting of snow along the Back Bay this afternoon, and got back to find a fresh email from Dom, of the stylin' glasses and crooked grin. A good day, all the way around.
And what am I doing to celebrate? Well, I'm sitting in my brother's basement with Harvest the Dog snoring softly at my feet and Moon the Wonder Mutt settled in a snowbank outside (her preference), listening to U2, sorting postcards and - of course - writing this. The U2 thing is new... Well, not new, because of course once upon a time I was infatuated with them, but it's been renewed of late, and I'm not entirely sure why. When I was a kid, I got The Joshua Tree on vinyl for Christmas one year - my first rock n' roll album. I listened to it until I nearly wore through the grooves, obsessed with One Tree Hill (a much better song than that godawful show on the WB).
Now, listening to the CD, I'm reminded of sitting with Mike in his unheated bedroom (mine was unheated, too, but he had a better record player and a miniature pool table), shivering, shooting pool with tiny plastic cues and drinking root beer while Bono sang about wars we didn't know the first thing about. Yeah, we were bad-ass. My brother's basement office now has more pictures in it than my entire apartment: Mike and I in footed pajamas under the Christmas tree back in 1978, shots of Mike with baby Katie in his arms, Mike with his high school buddies reunited for a recent trip to Foxwoods... I think back to those days in his room, before boyfriends for me or girlfriends for him, before the folks got divorced, before we had any idea life might have some obstacles in mind rather than just letting us take over the world unimpeded. And I can't help but wonder...
What the hell happened to that pool table?
Because I think it would make a good addition to my apartment now, and I bet it's stashed in the back barn someplace at mom's. I'll have to check that out.
Okay, that's it. That's my post, those are my deep thoughts, think of them what you will. I have now done my duty as the less-productive half of this extraordinary blogging experiment, at least for this week.
Wednesday, February 02, 2005
Sara Recommends 3
Jimmy, waiter from the South Portland Governor's restaurant
Yes, its a cheesy local family food chain, but its good eats with big portions, how American right? But the highlight was Jimmy, waiter extraordinaire. He has energy, charisma, and walks the fine line between amusing and annoying when it comes to the waiter-customer relationship. He tends to fall on the amusing side if you just let yourself go with it. Be responsive and not a grumpy bastard and he will be great. Hell, he called Joel "cupcake", and if you know Joel that is damn funny. He works there Wednesday to Sunday 11 to close. He let us know that!
Not procrastinating
It seems amazing that doing things ahead of time leaves you time to goof off and just enjoy yourself later on and not stress about deadlines. It's hilarious how I never seem to do that.
The random text message
People who have whole conversations over texting is just going to give them hand cramps. But the random quirky funny text is always a pleasant surprise on your phone
Emails & voice mails from Jen Blood
If you do not get them, then you are missing out. Because not only are they well written, they are a hoot. You get a glimpse into the quirky genius that is Jen Blood. Someday, I will transcribe a voice mail for the blog. There is often some kind of singing involved or an elaborate scene about her fabulous future. She is at no lack for imagination.
www.richfancher.com
Complete with headshots and videos! It's exciting! He is my favorite extra in the whole world. Plus I have very incriminating pictures of him. Rich in a box. Rich in a Niagara Falls hotel room with harlots. Rich in my sister's bed.
Peanut butter and celery
A classic from childhood that is extremely satisfying. Its the crunching that is the best part. Eating an obnoxious vegetable is reviving the 6 year old in me that blew bubbles in my milk. Ok, ok, it was last Tuesday, but at least I did not spill it this time.
Yes, its a cheesy local family food chain, but its good eats with big portions, how American right? But the highlight was Jimmy, waiter extraordinaire. He has energy, charisma, and walks the fine line between amusing and annoying when it comes to the waiter-customer relationship. He tends to fall on the amusing side if you just let yourself go with it. Be responsive and not a grumpy bastard and he will be great. Hell, he called Joel "cupcake", and if you know Joel that is damn funny. He works there Wednesday to Sunday 11 to close. He let us know that!
Not procrastinating
It seems amazing that doing things ahead of time leaves you time to goof off and just enjoy yourself later on and not stress about deadlines. It's hilarious how I never seem to do that.
The random text message
People who have whole conversations over texting is just going to give them hand cramps. But the random quirky funny text is always a pleasant surprise on your phone
Emails & voice mails from Jen Blood
If you do not get them, then you are missing out. Because not only are they well written, they are a hoot. You get a glimpse into the quirky genius that is Jen Blood. Someday, I will transcribe a voice mail for the blog. There is often some kind of singing involved or an elaborate scene about her fabulous future. She is at no lack for imagination.
www.richfancher.com
Complete with headshots and videos! It's exciting! He is my favorite extra in the whole world. Plus I have very incriminating pictures of him. Rich in a box. Rich in a Niagara Falls hotel room with harlots. Rich in my sister's bed.
Peanut butter and celery
A classic from childhood that is extremely satisfying. Its the crunching that is the best part. Eating an obnoxious vegetable is reviving the 6 year old in me that blew bubbles in my milk. Ok, ok, it was last Tuesday, but at least I did not spill it this time.
Sunday, January 30, 2005
Come Clean
http://www.comeclean.com/
This website feeds the voyuer in you without feeling too too dirty. Plus you can confess your sins. Its interesting trying to figure out who could be behind the confession. Some of them are lame but others are beauties. And seeing your confession on those beautifully manicured hands is cathartic.
Just a sampling of some of the confessions:
This website feeds the voyuer in you without feeling too too dirty. Plus you can confess your sins. Its interesting trying to figure out who could be behind the confession. Some of them are lame but others are beauties. And seeing your confession on those beautifully manicured hands is cathartic.
Just a sampling of some of the confessions:
- I fed my roommate's dog dish soap.
- Nsync is awesome.
- I dance around my room in assless chaps sometimes.
- I farted in church.
- My boyfriend is not all that hot but I tell him so to boost his small ego.
- I slept with my boss in the supply room.
- I jizzed in my friend's Gatorade and then she accidentally passed it to her mom.
- I don't brush my teeth.
- I fantasize about my sister-in-law's extremely large chest.
- I stole my neighbor's cat and took it to the pound as a stray.
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